The Very Secret Diary of Mikage Souji

Day 1: Nice office, when I can find it. Building like a maze.

Day 3: Apparently have 100 assistants. Seems like a few too many, really.

Day 6: Don't I have a laboratory around here somewhere?

Day 14: Saw faceless assistant pushing around this coffin on a cart all day. Apparently, he can't find a laboratory or morgue either.

Day 27: Met new liaison, this Chida woman. Too much makeup, terrible hair, affects beauty spot. Who does she think she is, Marilyn Monroe?

Day 32: Chida woman invited me to tea. Lipstick on all cups, weird beeping noise at random intervals. Cute younger brother, not sure he's really sick, think he may actually be junkie.

Day 37: Chida woman asked me to help her grasp eternity. Fortunately lost her in the halls. Took 3 hours to find office again.

Day 39: Chida woman caught me outside office. If grasping eternity had anything to do with what she suggested, I don't want it! Fortuitously encountered roaming coffin-pusher, offered to show her morgue. Seemed to put her off.

Day 43: Chida woman tried again. Told her to stuff eternity! Called me 'computer-like man.'

Day 44: Went to see cute younger brother while Chida out. Made small talk about grasping eternity. Think he likes me.

Day 47: Have realized am surrounded by hot boys in school uniforms. Nice scenery.

Day 48: Hot older man showed up in office, dropped off love letter. Playing hard to get.

Day 49: End of World propositioned me again, another letter. Still playing hard to get.

Day 50: End of World sent another love letter, this time with ring. Think am going to answer this one. Should I sign, 'Your eternal uke,' or, 'Your devoted cuddlelips'?

Day 51: While working on letter back, stumbled into conservatory where End of World in sweaty clinch with Chida woman. That little tramp!

Day 52: Went to see Mamiya. Convenient benches, cushions, in rose garden for grasping eternity.

Day 53: Tried to talk coffin-pusher into grasping eternity. Chased him down many hallways, finally lost him.

Day 54: Mamiya came by for afternoon. Where'd he get that candelabra?

Day 55: Mamiya back again. Think I almost got eternity that time.

Day 56: Mamiya came by. Orgy in dining hall. Candelabra action got out of hand, building burned down. Chida woman thinks it's all my fault. Got into slapfest with her.

Day 60: V. depressed. No more office, no more pretty boys. Went by to see Mamiya, got into slapfest with Chida woman again. Managed to knock her beauty spot off though! Go me!

Day 77: V. v. depressed. No grasping eternity for me! Wandering campus, sleeping in abandoned red convertible.

Day 82: Mamiya showed up, took me to building. Rebuilt! Who would have thought? Worked on grasping eternity again. Getting closer, I'm sure of it.

Day... not sure: Nice office. Mamiya brings me pretty flowers.

Another day: Didn't I have a name before?

Day: Mamiya getting into hydroponic gardening in basement. Bedroom full of roses from tank, though I never see more than one flower in there. Nice trick.

Day: Mamiya reminded me of name. Nice of him. Really almost grasped eternity.

Day: End of World visited. Never noticed resemblance between Mamiya and him before. No wonder Mamiya so hot.

Day: Basement room getting really creepy. Knocking at all hours, stinks of shoes.

Day: Practiced elevator speech on vapid chick. She lost duel. Figures. At least Mamiya got to stab the hell out of her. Must get him to fix pins on rose holders before next duelist comes along -- can't be stabbing all of them.

Day: Didn't think this one would win, but got kick out of machinations, seeing daylight. Saionji so desperate, didn't even have to try the 'grasping eternity' line on him.

Day: Launching coffins into flaming pit beneath building is FUN.

Day: Spent day hanging cute photos of duelists in foyer. Wonder how End of World takes them -- telephoto lens?

Day: More losses, have to fight now. Stupid cow trying to look like me showed up. Not fair! She punches!

Day: Mamiya actually dead! Who knew?

Day: Graduated? What the hell does he mean, graduated? Time to bum a bunk off some cute underclassman. Maybe I can find one that's into eternity...